New Year’s Resolutions are a funny thing. Christmas ends, we are all in a post-holiday slump, and suddenly we must pick a random goal and cross our fingers that we can actually follow through with whatever goal we have set for ourselves. From weight loss, to financial gains, the list of “goals” is never-ending. The problem is is that rarely we ever stick to our guns and follow through. Life gets crazy and suddenly its February and we have lost sight of everything we promised ourselves in January.

Well this year, its going to be different. Bet you’ve heard that one before… haven’t you? No, I’m serious. I have thought long and hard and made lots of lists and I think I have determined just about everything thats wrong with resolutions and how to overcome it. Just think, it’s 2019 and this could be YOUR YEAR. The year of actually following through.

First I am going to give you a little backstory, because I want to make sure I am as transparent with you as possible. My goal for probably the last 10 years has been related to image (sounds selfish, I know). Every year the ball drops in NYC and I tell myself “Alright Lauryn, this year you’re going to lose fat and gain that 6-pack you’ve always dreamed of.” I get a lot of backlash about my weight because I am petite, and I do not think I am fat by any means BUT, like probably 99% of the human population I am just not satisfied with my appearance. I always hear “your legs are so thin… I want your legs..” and when I bring up weight people usually blurt out “you do not need to lose weight.” But over the years I have just learned how to cover areas I don’t love… like my midsection. This is where I carry most of my fat. And again, before I get 100 messages about not needing to lose weight… I do not think I am fat. I just have always wanted to slim down my midsection and get a few abs… ya know what I mean? I have never felt completely comfortable in a swimsuit and thats what I want for myself. I’m allowed to be a little selfish, aren’t I? The problem with my goals and the reason I have never been able to fulfill my goal is that I set these expectations for myself that are nearly unattainable. This is all going to change (hopefully!) because in 2019 I am changing it up and following the next few rules below and I hope you will try these out for yourself so that we can work together… no matter what your goals are.

THE RULES

Think small. Why do we immediately set GIGANTIC goals that most people cannot attain? How many times have you heard “This year I am going to win the lottery” or “This year I am going to see the world” or ” This year I am going to quit ___” or “This year I am going to lose 100 lbs!” You get the point. Who can achieve these goals, reasonably? Sure, some people will in fact lose 100 lbs over the course of 1 year and that is AWESOME. But for most people, that goal is just not attainable. Instead of throwing out these extravagant goals, start small like so: “This year I am going to open up an investment account and save $100 extra a month” or “This year I am going to visit 2 new countries” or “This year I am going to use Nicotine gum and cut my smoking down to 2 cigarettes a day instead of 4” or “This year I am going to eat healthier, work out 3x a week, and try and lose 1-2 lbs a week.” These goals are much smaller, easier to achieve, and will help you continue to beat and set new goals for yourself.

Tell people about it. Why do New Year’s resolutions always have to be a secret? It might just be me, but I always grew up thinking New Year’s Resolutions had to be kept a secret or else it wouldn’t come true. Well, not this year. If you’re comfortable telling others, tell as many people as you can and turn it into a game. The more people that know you are trying to cut down smoking cigarettes, the more they will root for you and not place you in vulnerable situations. If you were to keep such a thing a secret, people will not know and will pressure you into having that additional smoke break that you are trying so hard to refrain from. If you are not comfortable telling the world, pick a couple close friends that you know will help hold you accountable. Its easier to fail at something when no one knows you are doing it/ no one is watching. So telling someone, even if it is just one soul, will help you because who wants to fail and have to tell everyone you failed? Not me.

Join a support group. This can mean SO many different things. This does not necessarily mean signing up for AA to sit in a circle and share your feelings, unless you are struggling with alcoholism and then you should definitely. This could simply mean joining a fitness class that meets regularly to keep you from not showing up or meeting with a financial advisor to help keep you in line with your spending. I used to work in the financial industry, and before starting I had no idea that anyone could use a financial advisor. Most advisors don’t charge you just to meet with them for advice- they make their money through your investment decisions/ insurance policies/ etc. Go meet with someone that knows what they are talking about, no matter your goal, and get some accountability.

Let yourself have a bit more freedom. Who else sets fitness goals like “I am going to cut out sugar and dairy.” 1. The nutrition major in me is cringing because you should NEVER completely cut out a food group unless you are actually allergic (aka. allergic to gluten because you have Celiac’s disease). Cutting out food groups is so detrimental and never lasts long-term. Anyways, instead of “cutting out sugar completely” from your diet, give yourself 1 cheat meal a week or something comparable. That is so much more achievable and lasts long-term, plus it gives you something to look forward to and WORK towards each week. Even if you are successful cutting out all sugar from your diet (ew..why?) odds are you are going to eventually introduce some sugar back into your diet and suddenly you’re heavier than before because you binged on all the sugary things. Don’t be that guy/ girl.

Think about how you are going to cope if you fail. Failing is a part of life. We all do it. It’s not fun, but we have to plan for what to do if we DO fail. Instead of tossing in the towel the second you make one little error (or big one… hopefully not though), plan for how you will deal and recuperate. Think about ways you know you will try and convince yourself to fail… and then think about how you will prevent yourself. For instance, lets say your goal is to go to the gym 3x a week. Odds are, you are going to come across one day where you tell yourself “it’s too cold to go to the gym” or “I already lost a little weight. I’m going to stay in and not go to the gym today.” Plan for these excuses. Instead, plan gym visits during a time that you have the least amount of temptation. If you already struggle getting up early and are not a morning person, do not try and wake up at 5am to workout. Instead, plan to go to the gym on nights after your children go to bed and your husband/ wife can stay and watch them for an hour or so. This can be said for those extra-chilly days that you just hate going to the gym. Instead, save some youtube workout videos that you can do at home for days that you cant seem to leave the house. There are so many options here.

If you made it to the end of this blog post, I salute you because that was a lot. But I am very passionate about this because I too have struggled so much with following through and have tried desperately to not. I hope that this post finds you well and that you are able to gain even just a little morsel of inspiration for your own life. Just remember to not beat yourself up. Changes take time, even if they are very small. You can do this and you can achieve that goal of yours. Lets make 2019 the best year yet, shall we?

Here is my New Year’s resolution, in case you were wondering: I am vowing to drink at least 2 Yeti tumblers of water every day. I am vowing to actually complete BBG from start to finish- no excuses. I am vowing to try and eliminate most snacks/ sugary items during the work week and indulge a bit on the weekends.

If you’re feeling up to it, drop your New Year’s Resolution below in the comments so that others can see what challenges you are battling and fight with you!

xox- Lauryn